I started doing the Miracle Morning practices four days ago. The six activities start to feel like they meld into one, which makes me feel unfocused and lazy, so I start a timer and just repeat the intention over and over. This is the mental practice I've needed to put my thoughts in order during the rest of my day.
1. Silence - I LOVE silence. I crave silence thoughout my day. My family isn't overly loud but I'm constantly surrounded by people. My brain is seldom quiet. There's a little song that plays whenever I try to be silent inside...it's similar to a Sara Bareilles song I heard years ago and it just never left me. It's like it's embedded in my cells and I can't quiet it. Almost like a ringing in my ears but it's deep inside my brain. Chakra sounds and Oms help to quiet it. Sitting in silence first thing in the morning for 1-3 minutes feels blissful and also helps to quiet the noise, and I use the suggestions in the book as an anchor ("I breathe in peace, I breathe out love") and that feels good. I find myself now stepping outside or into a quiet room througout the day for 30 seconds of silence. That intention has such a positive impact. Before I started it as a practice I'd find myself in silence for a few moments and recognize how energizing and peaceful it felt. I didn't realize the power it would have if I DECIDED to find those moments.
2. Affirmations - I felt silly when I tried to come up with affirmations on day 1. I have pretty positive self-talk all day long and it was uncomfortable trying to decide on one or two sentences that had power over my thinking. I think this stems from not clearly defining my WHY. My goals involve
having a lean, powerful, healthy body
effectively homeschooling my kids
having safe, exciting outdoor adventures
maintaining awesome friendships
I didn't put a ton of thought into the wheel of life inventory. I assigned numbers to each of the categories but I didn't go any deeper than a surface response. There were a couple of categories I don't think much about and I put them on a shelf to consider later.
As I tried to come up with my affirmations I turned to the MM Facebook group and found a couple of lists of affirmations. I settled on phrases about nutrition and timing of eating. I've thought about eating, fasting, food, and nutrition for decades, to the point of extreme annoyance with my own thoughts. As I found the phrase "I love to eat nutritious, healthy food", I felt a shift in my brain and my body. I've never said that to myself. I've said it to other people. I actually do enjoy eating nutritious foods, but as I thought about how I talk to myself about food, it mainfests as self-sabotage when I consider my health goals. I tell myself I LOVE and CHERISH the foods I ate as a child in the 1980s. I have an intense connection to Pop Tarts. I don't eat a Pop Tart but once a year or so, but my inner dialogue reinforces my past love of processed, engineered foods. I eat a pretty healthy diet, but the healthy foods are the physical nutrition I feed myself, like vitamins. They don't count, in my subconscious. I feed my soul and my brain with the foods I'm emotionally connected to. If I don't allow myself the treats, snacks, the packaged stuff, my reptilian brain thinks I'm starving. In line at the grocery checkout, the negotiation between my subconscious and my smart, conscious brain is ridiculous. Peppermint Patty = happiness. My subconscious tells me if I don't buy it, even to save for later, it's going to starve and be miserable.
So back to the affirmations, which tie into the visualizations. "I love to eat nutritious, healthy food" changes the whole equation. I fast until 4:00. When I leave the house with the kids for our outdoor adventures, I take food with me to break the fast. I typically pack a cooler full of food, mostly convenient snacky stuff. Yesterday I took an apple, grape tomatoes, two Babybel cheeses, and a giant carrot. Last week that would feel like I had my vitamins but not any real food. But something happened yesterday. I repeated my affirmation over and over. I let it wash over me and feel how it wanted to feel in my brain. At 4:05, I opened my container and was actually excited to taste the apple. The cheese was like a wonderful, nourishing burst of flavor. The whole eating experience felt different and clarifying. It's a small thought but a huge feeling.
3. Visualization - This feels equally as uncomfortable as affirmations. I opened my photos on my phone to an album called "Body", where I keep track of my body changes. The fact that I have that folder is a testament to the obsession, but as I write this at almost 44 years old, my mental state and my feelings about my body and my habits are mostly positive and realistic. I'm aware of the culture shift happening about body awareness, eating disorder awareness, cancellation of diet culture and the beauty industry, and the mixed opinions on Instagram have started to give me whiplash. As I become more aware, I become more able to pick and choose which influences I want to give my brain. I've backed away from scrolling at all, and when I do I'm looking for something specific that will feed my brain. That feels freeing and powerful. By backing away from social media for a while I think I'll start to process all the messages in order to define for myself what's healthy and sustainable for myself. I'm not sure any of us can completely divorce our personal health practices from the messages we've received throughout or lives. My diet and exercise preferences were largely shaped during my childhood. At some point I will be able to define health parameters for myself as an adult, free of emotional connection and advertising messages.
4. Exercise - I've settled on doing a bit of a yoga flow that I made up for myself, plus two rounds of 7 minute workout. I'll definitely add in more intense workouts later, but I'm getting back in the habit of moving first thing in the morning.
5. Read - For now I'm just reading a couple pages in the Miracle Morning book to check this off the list. By the time I've done the other activities here, my kids are awake and getting their mornings started, so I do more reading later in the day.
6. Scribe - I love my journals and write and doodle in them often during the day. Writing intentionally for a few minutes in the morning feels wonderful. I haven't had any revelations in my two minutes of scribing yet, but I have been able to record some thoughts about affirmations and visualizations that might be forgotten otherwise.
The challenge put forth by the MM book is to do this for 30 days. The only real challenge for me so far is allowing the rest of my family to sleep while I get up and moving. If I sleep in, I have to wake everyone up around 9:00 to start their day. Four days in a row I've been up at 8:00 (before my alarm) and everyone else in the house is awake five minutes later. I've done my best to be quiet but my wakeful energy just gets everyone else started too. I'm looking forward to the next 26 days!
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